Multiple times a week, I connect with a variety of people in my company who are looking for career coaching or advice. Often, these are conversations with very talented, high-performing people. However, I’m often surprised by the lack of self-awareness or confusion about where they stand within the organization.
IT’S LIKE DATING
When people don’t know where they stand, they get uncomfortable.
It’s not unlike dating. You are in a relationship with someone you really like, and you’ve decided to commit. And yet, they haven’t been forthcoming about their feelings. When this happens, sometime we (or at least most of us, from what I can tell) become insecure, and begin to make decisions we wouldn’t necessarily make.
We might ask our friends what our partner is thinking. We might start exploring other options. Bottom line: we might just sabotage the whole relationship, just because we didn’t have the courage or self-awareness to ask, “Where do we stand?”
I’d suggest the same behaviors apply within the business environment. You’ve made a good impression and you got hired. You believe you are off to a great start—you’ve bonded well with your team, you add value in meetings, and you are executing on your deliverables.
But does your manager feel the same way? If you don’t actually touch base with your manager and confirm that your own assessment of your work is on track with hers, you’ll be in a continuous state of wondering. Maybe they’re expecting you to execute on a different set of deliverables. Or maybe they aren’t even completely aware of what your results look like. Of course, a strong leader won’t leave you guessing. She or he will provide a steady stream of real-time feedback.
Just for the purposes of this discussion, though, let’s focus on these managers who don’t.
HOW TO ASSESS WHERE YOU STAND
Take a deep breath, gather all your confidence, and prepare for a direct conversation. Put some time into preparation—outline both your successes and areas for improvement—around the following areas to set yourself up for a healthy dialogue.
One additional helpful hint: listen with an open mind. Ask questions for clarification, and don’t argue. You are seeking to learn, not debate.
Skills: Do you bring a solid set of skills to the table? Having a strong grasp on the fundamentals of the job is typically the major component that scored you the role in the first place.
Just make sure your interpretation of how your new company wants you to execute in your role lines up with their expectations. Set clear goals together, and communicate often and openly on progress.
Attitude: Do you grab a shovel and dig in? Do you focus on your team’s success in addition to your own? Is your Emotional IQ just as strong as your skill set? Do you focus on bringing solutions to the table, not problems?
If you're nodding yes, you’re probably scoring pretty high attitude points.
Aptitude: It’s one thing to come to work with a good attitude and crank through your list. It’s another to show the capacity to learn and grow. It’s hard for managers to be inspired to give you more if you aren’t comfortable pushing yourself to develop and grow.
Culture Fit: What does your company truly value and believe in? You can be the greatest worker on the planet, but if you don’t subscribe to your company mission and belief system, it’s hard to be fully invested.
Impact: What impact are you truly adding to the business? Can you draw the line between what you are contributing and how it’s affecting the business? Growing profit and the bottom line are the only reasons a business thrives. Know your place in that element.
We all show up to work believing we are bringing our best. However, if you don’t know where stand, it’s easy to feel confused, uninspired, and perhaps even a little insecure.
The good news? You are likely in a way better relationship with your company than you realize. Sometimes, you just need to push the conversation and ask.
Christina Luconi is Chief People Officer for Rapid7. Follow her on Twitter: @peopleinnovator.